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    You are here Home » courage

    Out-of-the box Leadership / Leadership From Within

    Last updated on Aug 21, 2018 by Dan McCarthy · This post may contain affiliate links

    Guest
    post by Pratima Rao Gluckman:

    My
    daughter once told me, “Mom, I am awesome. I am good at math. I run fast. I am
    better than my brothers. Right?” As I looked into her darling eyes as she was
    desperately seeking validation, I thought, “This is where the problem lies.”
    It’s cute when a four-year-old thinks she is better than the rest. And yes, I
    want to encourage her to think that way, because it will build her self-esteem
    (as this is important for girls). But the problem is that adults feel that way
    all the time. Adults don’t say it aloud because it's not cute anymore. But we
    think it.

    Stereotyping starts at a very
    early age. Each of us believes we are better than everyone else around us. We
    believe specific groups of people who think and look like us are better than
    the rest. And so we begin to stereotype. We put people into little boxes, label
    them, and thereby create boundaries. We divide women and men into separate
    boxes. We place different races and cultures in separate boxes. We box people
    based on their sexual preference. As we compartmentalize, we grow up developing
    strong values of what is right and wrong.

    Who gets to break these boxes,
    silos, and stereotypes? Brave, self-aware and fearless people.

    When a brave person comes in,
    breaks open these boxes, and removes the labels, slowly changing the mindsets
    of people—that’s when a change occurs. Real change. That’s what a true leader
    does. Someone who is fearless, someone who is not afraid of criticism, someone
    who believes in making a difference will destroy the boxes. Someone who is aware
    of the power struggle between genders, races, and cultures will transcend the
    stereotypes.

    You can become one of these
    brave, fearless leaders. First, you need to tell yourself that you are not
    better than someone else. You must say to yourself that you are not better than
    someone else because your skin color is different, or because you are more
    educated, or because you are better looking. You should be grateful that you
    had the opportunities that came your way, but that doesn’t mean you are superior
    to the rest. However, this is hard to do. Because you then need to internalize
    that. You must go deep into your subconscious and undo all the wiring. You must
    become aware of your strengths and weaknesses. You have to know who you indeed
    are and what you stand for.

    And you need to forge these
    changes from within before you go out to change the world. Once you can
    genuinely transform yourself from your childhood beliefs, biases, and
    stereotypes, you can transform others, because when you see the change in yourself,
    you know what change looks like. While you transform others, you know what to
    look for, and most importantly that change is occurring.

    So where do you begin? Start
    with awareness, just noticing your thoughts as you go through the day. It’s a
    meditation: you don’t need to analyze and judge every thought and reaction.
    Thoughts come and go, with the power to shift your
    viewpoint
    all the time. For instance, you meet an interview
    candidate who seems older than you expected. Your first thought might be, “I
    don’t think she will be the right culture fit because she seems different from
    the kind of people we hire here.” Let that thought pass through your head.
    Don’t analyze it any further. Give that person a chance, because you never
    know—your internalized bias may be kicking in. So let other thoughts in as
    well. Now after you interview the candidate if you still feel that person is
    not right for your team, sure, pass her up. But you have opened your mind to
    other aspects of this person.

    To be effective leaders, we
    have to know ourselves well. From the inside out. Once we have an awareness of
    ourselves and the factors at play in our personal environment, we will be able
    to make better decisions for ourselves and for other people. Change comes from
    within, and in today’s world, we need this more than ever.


    Pratima Rao Gluckman, author of
    Nevertheless, She Persisted: True Stories of Women Leaders in Tech, knew she
    wanted to be an engineer from a young age. She attained a master's degree in
    computer science (University of Texas at Arlington), a master's degree in
    chemistry, and bachelor's degree in instrumentation engineering (BITs Plain
    India). Currently, in her field of enterprise software, she is Engineering
    Leader at VMware and manages a team of engineers.

    For
    more information, please visit
    www.PratimaGluckman.com.
    « Leadership at the Symphony
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